Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Have not posted since March 5

God it seems like this year has flown by so fast my wants and desires and still intact....competed back in May and was told I was to cut, ripped and lean for figure see they want us girls fuller! I had a goal this year but life sometimes gets in the way of your passions and being the body type I am I lost weight without even trying because see I have had many life changes since January but still held tight to my goal in May it kept me focused and fueled something I felt I needed to escape everyday life see I have used the Gym as my escape for many years as it has become my second home, the one place I could almost go into a meditative mode, just me and my IPod hammering it out and feeling stronger and charged in the end of workout.

Ok here it goes for years I have felt stressed and sick even had shingles at 34, never could put my finger on what my body was trying to tell me or what God was trying to tell me, The negative Energy around me at home was eating me up inside......literally eating me up until I had seen every Doctor known to man I decided it was in my head and went to hash all the manusha in my head out, who knew I had so much! Anyways back in January I filled for the big D. I figured at 39 either this was my lifes path or I make the choice for a different life while I was young enough to live it! If you have ever been through a divorce you will know that my decision did not come lightly and honestly even though my mind denied it I probably knew 3 years ago the truth I wanted my family together so I needed to come to terms my own health and what it was doing to me, what kindof of mother would I be if I was not mentally present!

Anyways fast forward and we are smack dap in August and I am a few weeks away from being a Independent, strong as bitch something for some reason along the way I forgot I could be! I will Prevail as Kai Greene says and my dreams will come true if I believe, and ya know what I finally believe in me and honestly I feel good.

Sorry for not posting in so long like I said sometimes life just gets in the ways and sometimes things must be put on the back burner for a bit but my motivation is coming back! Check this out I have even caught myself posing at the Gym.

Peace, Love and Muscle my blogger Friends,